Self-consciousness
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Self-consciousness is a number one enemy of Self-confidence. Firstly, let’s define what Self-consciousness is and then go on to describe how it affects your performance in social situations and what you can do to help yourself with this knowledge. The result - better Self-confidence!
Do you know was Self-conscious this is?
When you are in a social situation in someone puts you on the spot, maybe they ask you an awkward or difficult question suddenly become aware of yourself, you focus on yourself and your reactions. You start to notice how nervous you feel. This is Self-consciousness - focusing on yourself. Your brain cannot come up with an answer and you look worried interest in your confidence drops.
Another example, you are asked suddenly to speak in front of a large group of people. Suddenly you feel eyes are on you and you are aware of the rush of adrenaline and then you feel yourself sweating or shaking. You cannot think because you are focused on your own physical reaction. At the moment when you need to perform you are focused on yourself and you become even more nervous. This is Self-consciousness and it is preventing you from being confident.
Confidence?
It destroys it totally is the answer because it increases your anxiety! When you are in a stress full social situation you need to relax to be confident and if you can’t you won’t feel in control and you won’t look relaxed. Your body language will tell others that you are not confident which will affect how the act towards you in this world make you feel even more unconfident. When you are relaxed you look and feel confident and in control of your mind and is free to think about the challenges you face. Perhaps are talking to an important person or a member of the opposite sex who you find attractive and all you want is to be yourself and act confidently. Self-consciousness makes you nervous and stops you from being natural; in short it affects you negatively.
Public speakers know that Self-conscious is an enemy and they learn to overcome it. Everyone gets nervous about public speaking, but beating Self-consciousness is one step to being confident and a successful public speaker.
In any social situation especially those you feel most difficult you need to remove the focus away from yourself and what your body is doing what you want to do - speak well and present yourself positively.
How can you concentrate on used your answers to questions or your response to someone if you are occupied with worrying in ever-increasing negative thoughts which only makes you more self-conscious and stressed? How can you be at your best when inside you are panicking and confused?